I was trolling around the White House Giftshop website, trying to find out what became of those commemorative coins Trump ordered to celebrate his “historical” (read: “hysterical”) meeting with Kim Jong-un.  In case you, too, were wondering, they ship August 30.

My question answered, I came across something infinitely more entertaining: the first in a a new series of Presidential Christmas Bobbleheads , representing (you guessed it) the current Bobble-Head-in-Chief.  Amusing as that may be for obvious reasons, a picture of the novelty gave rise to all-out hilarity around our house which I thought I’d share with our generally glee-less readership.

Now I ask you to be the judge.  Look at the slim youthful figure, luxuriant blonde hair and boyish grin.  That’s the spitting image, not of Donald J. Trump, but of Bill Clinton on his first campaign, before he put on that “freshman fifteen” pounds in the Oval Office.

Then I read the promotional text, cut-and-pasted here for full effect:

Donald John Trump became the 45th President of the United States on Friday, January 20, 2017. He was sworn in with his left hand on both his personal and also on the Lincoln Bible. Trump’s path to the presidency was long and reasoned. Intimations of his presidential potential appeared as early as 1987 when a large group of supporters gathered outside a Rotary Club meeting in New Hampshire and waved signs: Trump for President and Trump in ’88.

We have chosen three symbols to represent President Donald J. Trump’s first White House Christmas:

1. The Christmas Tree represents Trump’s campaign promise to evangelical Christians, “We’re going to start saying Merry Christmas again.”

2. The portrait of Abraham Lincoln represents President Trump’s respect for Lincoln as the quintessence of American Presidents. As Trump stated, “I can be more presidential than any president … except for Abraham Lincoln.”

3. The diorama scene with President Trump in the State Dining Room at hearth and fireplace represents President Trump’s entrepreneurial spirit and iconic successes in the hotel and hospitality industry. The hearth is redolent of the fire that heats a home as well as suggestive of Trump’s enormous passions as entrepreneur and now as President of the United States.

We hope you will enjoy this first diorama in your new, ongoing, and sophisticated limited edition diorama collection of the White House Gift Shop, Est. 1946 by permanent memorandum of President Harry S. Truman and volunteers of U.S. Secret Service Uniformed Division.

Merry Christmas and Seasons Greetings

Anthony Giannini, Executive Director

The White House Gift Shop, Est. 1946®

Mr. Giannini is also credited as the creator of the series, but formatting clumsiness and errors in the overblown text suggest that, if Donald Trump didn’t actually compose it himself, one of his “best people” was in charge of the roll-out.

(By the way; why was Trump’s left hand on his “personal” and the Lincoln bible?   Doesn’t that mean he was touching his “personal” to the Lincoln bible?  ‘Must violate more than a few archival rules, I would think!)

‘Hope this turns that frown upside down.  Happy Tuesday.