There’s a phrase that jumped out at me while reading this morning’s Battleboro reformer:

Hikers on the new Woodlands Interpretive Trail will be able to enjoy a full sensory experience.

Okay.  

…Part of the Brattleboro Retreat’s network, the interpretive trail is now officially open. It is a moderate one-mile loop along the recreational trails and features 18 placards that point out interesting natural aspects of the trail for visitors, such as where lightning struck a tree and the site of granite that traveled to Brattleboro from Dummerston via a melting glacier.

Nice.

But unlike other hiking trails, the interpretive path offers a new audio recording that coincides with the walk.

Huh?

Oh.

That’s the “full sensory experience” referenced earlier in the piece.  Something you can listen to while out on a walk on a nature trail which keeps you from hearing nature.

Look, I’m all for nature trails, and I like those interpretive trails that tell you where some unusual plant grows or where a tree fell 300 years before or what uncommon bird nests in whatever bush you’re looking at.  These are good things, and they engage people.

I’ve got nothing against technology.  It has its place.  Just please… don’t try to peddle the idea that listening to your iPod, Zune or whatever else while walking a trail gets you more engaged with nature.  

But hey, if we’re going to call listening to pre-recorded audio on your iPod “a full sensory experience” why not just give everyone a 3d video to watch as well?  I mean, hey, that enhances the “sensory experience,” doesn’t it?  Maybe you could sit at home and have someone occasionally stick a stone in your shoe while you walk in place.  Get some mosquitoes in the mix, and you’ve done a full simulation of the outdoor experience.  

I think I might have a better idea for what might constitute a “full sensory experience:”

Go outside.  

Walk.  

Look.  

Listen.