Hillary Clinton’s Top Secret Emails

“Hey, Hey, Hey!  I really enjoyed putting it to you years ago.  Next time, let’s do it without the drugs in your drink.  Hey, Hey, Hey!”

“Do NOT ever contact me again!  I will report you to a certain person I know who takes care of troublesome people for me.  Remember Vince Foster?!”

“Hey, Hil, remember in ’64 when we were Goldwater Girls together?  Heh-heh.  If you get elected, can I get a job with you?”

“I’ll put you on my list.  We need more Goldwater Girls with balls to straighten out those assholes in Congress.  Do you know anything about drugging drinks?  In my heart, I know I’m right.  Heh-heh.  And remember:  Extremism in the defense of INTELLIGENCE is no vice.  That’s what I’m telling AP.”

“Yo, Blondie.  Ya gonna do some moves about all these white cops gunnin’ down the brothas?  Or are ya gonna be a Bitch like that Marcia Clark ho?  The Bama ain’t doin’ shit.  How bad ya want our votes?”

“Very bad.  I’ll make you and your Bros Special FBI Agents and Justice Department Investigators.  I want to be inclusive.  Can you and your Bros drug drinks in a drive-by?”

“Dear Undisclosed Recipient:  Your email ballbusting@hotmail.org is in process of being phished by us.  Please clicky-click below linky to pay us to stop.  Thanky you.”

“You dirty male pig Chinese hackers!  You wait!  In 2017 I’ll be coming to Beijing to make a big speech about Women’s Rights, like I did at the World Conference On Women in ’95.  Then, with bazillions of Chinese women reading my little red book, Quotations From President Hillary, and rampaging around in a new Cultural Revolution, all you male pig bastards will have to move to Vermont and open up Chinese restaurants.  Then I’ll appoint Peter Sterling my Health Food Czar and he’ll tax all your asses until the U.S. recovers that 7.4% of our national debt you bastards have bought.  You wait!”

“Hi.  I’m a 26 year-old woman who wants to be President too someday.  Can you help me?”

“Well, I would suggest you first marry a guy who’ll become President some day.  Then, when he’s discovered having had illicit sex with White House aides, claim they put drugs in his drinks and move to Vermont and run for the U.S. Senate.  If that asshole Bernie Sanders is still alive, put drugs in his water at the debates.  But if you don’t go that way, and I’m elected in 2016, don’t fuck with my third term!”

“How do you stand it?  I mean, like gross–All this Benghazi stuff.  And I gotta know, and tell my friends–Do you buy your own outfits?”

“Bill buys all my outfits for me.  It’s what I gave him to do.  He has to do something, and he likes ladies clothing stores.  Benghazi?  Was that something on Facebook?”

“Madame Clinton–We the people of the Islamic No-Sense-Of-Humor Brotherhood respectfully ask you how you stand on cartoons poking fun at Allah?”

“I AM Allah.”

Peter Buknatski

Montpelier, VT.

One thought on “Hillary Clinton’s Top Secret Emails

  1. I sure do – who could forget. He was probably the only good and honest individual in the Clinton WH or that the Clintons ever knew. She hauled him up to Washington from Rose as her ‘personal assitant’ then proceeded to destroy him with demands an honest broker could never concede to – maneater comes to mind.

    This website gives fairly evenhanded ops on various topics:

    http://www.truthorfiction.com/

    Clinton stint at running our country was marked by scandal & corruption which seems to precede & follow them wherever they appear. A tree is known by its fruit – politician is known by their loot.

    Seems to be a high ‘body count’ of individuals connected to the Clintons sometimes in oddly circuitous ways — this website is concise & easy to read but smacks of the usual misdirected links and other click-bait whoredom but a pretty good sift:

    http://whatreallyhappened.com/

    No doubt these sites are run by those who are opposed to a Clinton run but the truth is the truth no matter the source and perhaps reliable public figures don’t wish to join those who in Clintons orbit now pushing up daisies — however there are maaany good-read books on their bad acting and antics.

    The sheer quantification of their fancy f’kups fills volumes. Sorry, not buying any of the carefully-worded and legal-counselese complicated and lengthy explanations.

    They have redefined the meaning of ‘corrupt’- I cannot find the words to describe the level of routinely sordid & shamelessly unconcionable activity that emanates from the Clinton Machine which is exactly what it is – machine politics at its finest.

    I believe also that ‘the Hill’ is failing on a physical/mental level — a disconnect and remote mental acuity is of note in several settings in recent memory. Has appeared mildly drunk at times, whether meds or a several-martini lunch or dinner it’s obvious.



    If POTUS would be a mere puppet as well as puppeteeress with first dude and ‘His Horniness’ running the show surrounded by their unending roster of lackeys of questionable character doing their badass bidding.

    Secret-Servergate — flaunting, ignoring & breaking the law on many levels is another show of astonishing arrogance and a preview of a Clinton WH. No f’king thank you.

    Yes PS she does indeed personify the “I am Allah”.

    As another good one PS! If I ‘disappear’ – ask questions pls.

     

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